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When i was about six, i went into the restroom one day and i saw the toilet seat up. I realized it was my brother, who was ten years older than me. I came to the conclusion that little kids sat on the toilet seat, but when they got older, their butts got bigger and they put the toilet seat up and sat right on the bowl.
I tried to sit on the bowl, but my butt fell in.
I used to believe that if i sat on the toilet for too long, a prosthetic arm was going to fly out of the toilet shove itself up my butt.
I dont know why! I was a weird kid!
I used to think that when you flushed the toliet and you stood too close I thought you would get sucked in.
When I was little I had never been to the men's restroom, because my mom always took me in the ladie's restroom with her. Once we were at the store with her boyfriend, and he took me to the men's room. I had never seen a urinal before. I told my mom that her boyfriend had just peed in the sink!
When I was about two or three, my parents gave me my very own cardboard box and explained to me that by pretending, it could be anything I wanted it to be.
I thought it was perfectly logical to want my very own toilet, right in my own room. So I peed in it.
When I was a little girl I thought that my poop came alive after I flushed the toilet and lived with my other poops in the pipes. I pictured a long condo type of world where there were big poops (daddy), all the way to the teeny poops which were babies. (I can't believe I'm actually sharing this after 30 odd years of keeping this to myself!!!) I thought that they lived a good life, happy to out of me and on their own. I thought of the different neighborhoods and my friends poops meeting my own.
I'm happy to say I grew up to be well adjusted and hadn't thought about this since I was a little girl. Reading these other submissions prompted me to share my own.
When i was little (like 3 or 4) my big sister (by three years) told me that there was a "potty monster" and when you went number 2 it would come and eat you ass.....only for like a day though cause my mom told me it wasnt true....
I used to believe that there were little people (who looked just like the Keebler elves) who lived in the toilet and drank pee and used poo as play-dough.Weird, huh?
Our primary school toilets were very old-fashioned and had khaki-coloured doors. The cleaner's cupboard was next to the rows of cubicles and was the same length as each cubicle, but slightly wider, with two doors that were always locked. On my first time there, I thought it was a special, extra-big toilet with lots of exciting things inside. I figured it was always locked because someone else was in there and it was very popular. For years I believed this and was desperate to get in there, and I could never understand why someone always beat me to it. Even if I went in class time, it appeared to be taken. I couldn't believe my bad timing.
It was only about 5 years later when I was in there one day and the cleaner came in to get something out of the cupboard that I realised the truth.
When I was young (under ~10 years of age), I believed that the toliet would not flush during an electrical power failure. Any time I had to tinkle or drop a stool, I'd leave it unflushed until the lights came back on; then quickly race to that bathroom and flush.
I used to believe that the toilet had "tides" and when it was on "low tide" you could go down the toilet and you would go into the sewers. To add to this i would only use toilets at 'safe' times, to avoid having to live in the sewers!
i thought in the sewers there was a couple of guys, and a bunch of pipes, each labbeled with a families last name, and when 1 would fill up, they'd have to dump it in a landfill. never thought of how it gets there though.
im 13, and i still belive it, except now i think scientists are doing a study on the size of your poos, and if you need the plungr, u get an A+.
I used to think that if I flushed the toilet several times in a row, I could make it overflow.
when i was little, i hated going to pee during the night because i thought that if i didn't make it from the bathroom back into my bed before the toilet stopped making flushing noises, vampires would swoop into my house and take me away. needless to say, i rarely washed my hands.
i used to beleive that there was a toilet fairy
I used to believe that when you bought a house, it came with a limited supply of water and after you used the toilet, it would go through "The water cleaner" and be clean again and you could drink it. I refused to go into the shower when the water was brown and we needed a filter.
When i was little i used to believe that anything you flushed down the toilet would come back up with the new water. one day when i was three i told my mom i could go to the bathroom all by myself. she asked if i was sure i i said "of course i'm sure." She told me to change into my pajamas while i was in there. to test my theory, i flushed my favorite pajamas down the toilet (they were silk so the toilet didn't clog). i stared at the toilet for a while waiting for them to come back up but the only thing that came down(i later learned that water came down, not up) was new water. my mom asked what was taking so long and i ran out of the bathroom in my underwear crying and screaming "THE TOILET ATE MY PAJAMAS AND IT WON'T GIVE THEM BACK!!!" my mother quietly laughed at me and then explained how toilets actually worked.
I used to beleve that the toliet was called the bog monster
There was always this terrible musky smell in the bathrooms at my preschool. I decided the odor was from boys and leaves, and I called the smell "izzies."
When I was little, (four to five) I would believe that some kind of monster (for some reason he was nice) would eat everything you put into the toilette, and for some reason, he really liked poop. So I'd talk to him while I was on the toilette and say "I'm pooping hard for you so you'll get full"
I also had an uneasy feeling like he would eat my butt if I didnt poop or pee enough.
Needless to say, I dont talk much to the monster in the toilette anymore. (Ok, maybe once in a while, to make sure I'm on his good side. =)