A childhood belief about characters

At age 9, I used to believe that there were only three religions in the whole world: Catholic, Jewish, and Satanist. My best friend was Jewish, and one day I asked her about the Jewish faith. She leapt into the subject with much enthusiasm. She said that Moses and the Israelites were forced out of Egypt by the not-Jewish pharaoh. She described this in gory detail, gleefuly recounting rather more deaths then there were people. I asked her whether the pharaoh and other Egyptians were Satanist, to which she said no. Therefore, I reasoned that Catholics had driven Moses out of Egypt.
And that, my friends, is how I decided that devil-worship was not as bad as those cruel, awful Egyptian Catholics made out. (I was only disabused of this notion in the 5th grade.)